So anyway, this is a pseudo-official greeting from a user who may or may not be a admin/sysop/werewolf, so here come the obligatory links to pages to help you out and tell you "Don't be teh vandal kthx":
So, that's it all for now... Please be nice, make great articles and help contribute to our community in any way possible: e.g. template making, voting for articles or users, et cetera.
“NO ACTUALLY, YOU'RE TERRIBLE AND WE HOPE YOU DIE.”
Er, welcome. Yes. What the big template says. Or something. ~ 02:11, 29 Ergust 2011
 Allo allo
- Ooh! –You have reached~ Message sent by Mnid, who is someonea person you can talk to. 01:59, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)
 N00b Programz
Hello, Mnidawhatever. Welcome to Illogicopedia! However, I am terribly sorry to inform you that there is no equivalent to Adopt a n00b herem However, if it is a mentor you need, Colonel Sanders is on the case! I see you are a Uncle Pete regular, so I assume there is no need to go over basic wiki operations. Do you need help writing? If so, I can help! I am capable of writing stuff other than political nonsense, contrary to popular belief, but I usually choose not to. For example, see my very first article.
I can see about taking it up with Seppy and the Illogicomedia Foundation to put in place something similar to Adopt a n00b but with no guarantee of success.
I can help you as long as you want me to. In no time, you will be a member of the ?Pedia community! I also take it flattering you consider me important. I ain't no adminz here (Though I am on the ?media Foundation and Simple English Uncyclopedia, as well an extended right Member on other sites). Anything else, please
hesitate to ask.--Colonel Sanders 16:55, 10 Serpeniver 2011 (UTC)